Sorry for the delay in posting the Unjobd Experiment report.  Day was interesting and depressing at the same time.  We applied for jobs at WalMart and Office Depot.  Each application took approximately 45 minutes.  It’s crazy how much they want to know about you.  The WalMart one even asked us to answer 65 questions regarding possible work scenarios on top of the usual application process.  More work than either of us has ever done for a writing job or even a minimum wage job back in the day.  At this point neither of us has been called in for an interview.  Full report to come on Unjobd.com

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Tomorrow’s an exciting day for “Unjobd.” Experiment!

So I woke up this morning to the usual sounds of jackhammers at 7AM.  Gotta love living in between construction sites.  Why do I do that, you ask?  Well, because I, and my wife, are unemployed.  Moving isn’t really an option at this point.  But there’s sprouts of jobs coming in on this 430th day of joblessness.  Got an email from a producer friend of mine who I’ve been in contact with lately and he’s hooking me up with a pitch for a series he sold.  Gotta love this guy.  He’s super successful, super busy, but still found the time to hook me up with a possible.  I owe him just for his thoughts, never mind what I’ll owe him if I get the gig.

Also, started my latest screenplay yesterday.  A horror pic.  I really like the idea, characters and with a thirty page outline, it should be easy to write the draft in two weeks time, then begin rewriting.

Still waiting on to hear feedback on my book proposal.  Got a lotta people chomping at the bit to read it, but of course, I have to get it read, sold, written, edited and printed before that’ll happen.

Also had some success this weekend of talking to old friends in the biz who want to do something with me so I’ll be sending them ideas for shows and we’ll collaborate and hopefully pitch and sell to someone.

So, yes, I’m busy.  Still unemployed, but busy.  But I guess you’re never unemployed in this town, you’re just between gigs.  It’s just sometimes the time between is longer than the jobs themselves.

In other news, the wife’s been hitting the pavement hard, applying for like three jobs a day in her field.  I gotta think something’s gonna pop for her soon.  Definitely more jobs coming up on her searches every day.  Maybe the economy is starting to recover.  At least that’s what all the construction and development around me is saying.

Point of this post is, sprouts are coming up from the job market like a new lawn planted before the rain.  And each one of those seedlings means a bullet, headed right at my nemesis, Unemployment.  I hope you got your Matrix moves down, Unemployment.  Shots fired.

As I wrote in yesterday’s blog, I’ve declared war on unemployment and I’m going to crush it.  Unemployment must have read my blog because this morning I woke up to a nice little surprise from my wife.  She informed me that she’s going to talk to our lawyer about whether or not she can look for work in Vancouver, Canada (her hometown) while still maintaining her greencard/path to citizenship.  God damn you, Unemployment!  It’s flanking me.  It knows I’m coming to get it and is trying to knock me down before I find it and pummel it’s ass.  Using my wife to kick me in the gut, that’s low even for you, Unemployment.  And I won’t take it.

I understand why she feels the need to look for work.  The reports yesterday of job losses in the U.S. were not encouraging to anyone, never mind someone who’s out of work as she and I both are.  But the thought of her moving away and I having to make the choice to follow is disturbing.  It is definitely not something you want to think about when you’re trying to write and find work.  But that’s exactly Unemployment’s plan, isn’t it?  To get me down, to weaken me, so then it can come in and deliver the final blow.

But I ain’t having that, Unemployment.  I’m back on my feet before the man counted to ten and I’m ready for another round.  You hit me hard last week with losing out on a job, making my wife cry and turning her back toward her homeland.  But I’m stronger than you and I will prevail.  And when I do, I’ll pull out my wiener and pee all over you, then pass on my success story to other people who are unemployed so they too can defeat you.  Your time is coming, Unemployment… better prepare.  ‘CUZ I’M COMING FOR YOU!

As my close friends and family know, I’ve been unemployed for almost fourteen months now.  It’s been a tough road.

It all started when I lost my writing job on a Nickelodeon show last August rather unexpectedly.  My girlfriend and I had mad plans not a month before that for her to move down to L.A. with plans of us getting married.  When the news came of my job loss, she had already quit her job and ended her apartment lease, so there was nothing we could do except say to hell with it, let’s do this.  So she came down, I proposed, she moved in and we hit the road to the future.

At this point things start getting hairy.  After the bliss of the wedding and first few months of marriage wore off, we came to the harsh reality of me being the only bread winner while she waited for her work visa.  The money in my bank account became less and less and less…  I was up for a couple of jobs, but didn’t get them.  In January a job finally came through.  Well, kind of.  I was told I had it on Friday, then Monday got a call saying I didn’t have it.  What happened over the weekend I don’t know.

I ended up getting hired by that company again a few weeks later, only to have that job ripped from under me as well.  The studio exec that’d brought me in had been fired and as it goes in Hollywood, everything she was attached to went bye-bye.

So there I was.  Back to nothing.  No job prospects, no money coming in at all.  I’ve been living in the horrible abyss of the unknown since then.  Sure there’s been days of happiness when a residual check comes in.  But it’s never enough to be ecstatic about.  Just enough to keep us alive for another month.

My wife finally got her green card and work visa in April and hit the town hard, looking for work.  She’s a marketing writer and a damn good one with a long resume.  We both thought it wouldn’t take her long to find work, but now the second day of October, she too has found nothing for employment.  So on we go, my bank account draining an disappearing.

The days go by fast while I try and write the next thing to give my manger to sell.  But each one encompasses the same thing.  Ennui.  I wouldn’t normally use a word like that, but that’s the only way to describe the life of boredom that I lead.  Maybe it’s because I’m a storyteller and I’d hope for a better, less linear storyline, but this whole unemployed life just sucks.  Every day it’s the same thing.  Wake up, have breakfast, start writing.  Break for lunch, write some more.  Have dinner, write some more.  The only time anything exciting happens is when I get turned down for yet another job.  I had one day last month where I got turned down for two gigs within’ fifteen minutes of each other.  That certainly wasn’t fun.  It did kinda break up the boredom.

I went into a bit of a downward spiral on that one.  “It’s never gonna change.  I can’t find work.  What are we gonna do?”  This of course all said in my head as to not upset my wife who’s been riding the wave of anxiety and depression right beside me.  But as with any wave, eventually it ends at the shore and either you walk up the beach or get pulled back in to ride the wave again.  I always get pulled back in.

But things changed last night.  Up to this point we’ve shared the emotional burden of our situation.  Each of us seemed to be up while the other was down which lead to a good support system although not the most fun of a daily existence.  But we were making it through.  Then I lost out on a big job yesterday.  I mean, huge.  Like employment for over a year on a great show that I watch regularly.  But it wasn’t to be so I reacted sad, anxious, annoyed and went to the gym to clear my head.  Having been through so many rejections lately, I’m getting used to it, so I bounced back quickly and was back to working on my feature script later last night.

Then I went to bed and found my wife crying.  Crying for a job I lost.  Which I wasn’t sure what to think of at first.  “Why are you crying about my job?”, I asked.  “I don’t know.  I guess I just hoped it would happen.”  As I held her and felt her tears falling off her face and onto my wrists, I began to get angry.  Not at he of course, but at unemployment.  That dick made my girl cry.  That ain’t cool.  You can fuck with me all you want unemployment, but not with her.  I’m gonna find you, unemployment, and when I do, it’s on.  I’m gonna beat you ’till you can’t make anyone cry.   I’M COMING FOR YOU!

Oh, yeah, if you see unemployment, let me know where he’s at.  ‘Cuz he’s going down!